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Men and Women Quotes and Quotations
 A man is never so weak as when a woman is telling him how strong he is.  Commuter - One who spends his life in riding to and from his wife; a man who shaves and takes a train, and then rides back to shave again. Eve left Adam, to meet the Devil in private. I should like to see any kind of a man, distinguishable from a gorilla that some good and even pretty woman could not shape a husband out of. It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. Manly men and womanly women are still here but feeling nervous. Men always talk about the most important things to perfect strangers. Men are made by nature unequal. It is vain, therefore, to treat them as if they were equal. That all men are equal is a proposition to which, at ordinary times, no sane individual has ever given his assent. There is more difference within the sexes than between them. When women go wrong, men go right after them. - Mae West Women are never disarmed by compliments. Men always are. Breathes there a man with hide so tough Who says two sexes aren't enough? If men and women are to understand each other, to enter into each other's nature with mutual sympathy, and to become capable of genuine comradeship, the foundation must be laid in youth. American women expect to find in their husbands a perfection that English women only hope to find in their butlers. A man's idee in a card game is war- crool, devastatin' and pitiless. A lady's idee iv it is a combynation iv larceny, embezzlement an' burglary. Women have one great advantage over men. It is commonly thought that if they marry they have done enough, and need career no further. If a man marries, on the other hand, public opinion is all against him if he takes this view. What is most beautiful in virile men is something feminine; what is most beautiful in feminine women is something masculine. In our civilization, men are afraid that they will not be men enough and women are afraid that they might be considered only women. A woman means by unselfishness chiefly taking trouble for others; a man means not giving trouble to others. Thus each sex regards the other as basically selfish. Failing to be there when a man wants her is a woman's greatest sin, except to be there when he doesn't want her. There is probably nothing like living together for blinding people to each other. I wish Adam had died with all his ribs in his body. Behind every great man there is a surprised woman. Behind every successful man you'll find a woman who has nothing to wear. If a man hears much that a woman says, she is not beautiful. God has given you one face, and you make yourselves another. Men have a much better time of it than women. For one thing, they marry later. For another thing, they die earlier. There is no word equivalent to 'cuckold' for women. He and I had an office so tiny that an inch smaller and it would have been adultery. A man is a person who will pay two dollars for a one-dollar item he wants. A woman will pay one dollar for a two-dollar item she doesn't want. A woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted by a little physical antipathy. When I was very young, I kissed my first woman, and smoked my first cigarette on the same day. Believe me, never since have I wasted any more time on tobacco. The double standard of morality will survive in this world so long as the woman whose husband has been lured away is favoured with the sympathetic tears of other women, and a man whose wife has made off is laughed at by other men. Flirtation - attention without intention. All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his. As the faculty of writing has chiefly been a masculine endowment, the reproach of making the world miserable has always been thrown upon the women. Though statisticians in our time have never kept the score man wants a great deal here below and Woman even more. A good cigar is as great a comfort to a man as a good cry is to a woman. A man should be taller, older, heavier, uglier and hoarser than his wife. Even the wisest men make fools of themselves about women, and even the most foolish women are wise about men. I love men, not because they are men, but because they are not women. It women knew what we were thinking, they'd never stop slapping us. What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere? A woman is like a tea bag - only in hot water do you realize how strong she is. Macho does not prove mucho. Tell me about yourself - your struggles, your dreams, your telephone number. Be pretty if you can, be witty if you must, be agreeable if it kills you. For a single woman, preparing for company means wiping the lipstick off the milk carton. Men like cars, women like clothes. Women only like cars because they take them to clothes. She has such a nice sense of rumor. Men don't get cellulite. God might just be a man. If you ever leave me, I'll go with you. The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a male is when he's a baby. What would we say if men changed the length of their trousers every year? Boys don't make passes at female smart asses. Why did God make man before he made woman? Because he didn't want any advice on how to do it. Can you imagine a world without men? No crime and lots of happy fat women. Man - a creature made at the end of the week's work when God was tired. Ginger Rogers did everything that Fred Astaire did. She just did it backwards and in high heels. Men who drink herbal teas are seldom serial killers. If the world were a logical place, men would ride sidesaddle. Outside every thin girl is a fat man, trying to get in. You know who must be very secure in their masculinity? Male ladybugs. - Jay Leno I want to know why, if men rule the world, they don't stop wearing neckties. There are more men than women in mental hospitals - which just goes to show who's driving who crazy. 
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