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If you want to know how old a woman is . . . ask her sister-in-law.

- Edgar Howe

Never eat more than you can lift.

- Miss Piggy

Jesus is moved to happiness every time He sees that you appreciate what He has done for you. Grip His pierced hand and say to Him, "I thank Thee, Savior, because Thou hast died for me." Thank Him likewise for all the other blessings He has showered upon you from day to day. It brings joy to Jesus.

- O. Hallesby

One religion is as true as another.

- Henry Burton

Happiness is composed of misfortunes avoided.

- Alphonse Karr

B.I.B.L.E. = Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.

- Anonymous

A bachelor is a souvenir of some woman who found a better one at the last minute.

- Anonymous

We offer up prayers to God only because we have made Him after our own image. We treat Him like a Pasha, or a Sultan, who is capable of being exasperated and appeased.

- Voltaire

A friend is one before whom I may think aloud.

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I can stand what I know. It's what I don't know that frightens me.

- Frances Newton

A camel is a horse designed by a committee.

- Anonymous

There is no wisdom equal to that which comes after the event.

- Geraldine Jewsbury

As to posterity, I may ask what has it ever done to oblige me?

- Thomas Gray

Fear is an emotion indispensable for survival.

- Hannah Arendt

Divorce is a game played by lawyers.

- Cary Grant

In prayer the lips ne'er act the winning part, without the sweet concurrence of the heart.

- Robert Herrick

What you think is an illusion created by your glands, your emotions and, in the last analysis, by the content of your stomach. That gray matter you're so proud of is like a mirror in an amusement park which transmits to you nothing but distorted signals from reality forever beyond your grasp.

- Ayn Rand

To live means to have ... a mission to fulfill-and in the measure in which we avoid setting our life to something, we make it empty.

- Jose Ortega y Gasset

From error to error one discovers the entire truth.

- Sigmund Freud

Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.

- Bill Cosby