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Robert Orben Quotes and Quotations


There are days when it takes all you've got just to keep up with the losers.
- Robert Orben | Life Quotes
"Wait'll next year!" is the favorite cry of baseball fans, football fans, hockey fans, and gardeners.
- Robert Orben | Hope Quotes
I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.
- Robert Orben | Family Quotes
My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she's as old as I am. Then she lies about my age.
- Robert Orben | Birthdays and Age Quotes
It's an awful thing to grow old by yourself. My wife hasn't had a birthday in seven years.
- Robert Orben | Birthdays and Age Quotes
I may be forty, but every morning when I get up, I feel like a twenty-year-old. Unfortunately, there's never one around.
- Robert Orben | Birthdays and Age Quotes
New Yorkers are so impersonal, if it wasn't for muggings there wouldn't be any contact at all!
- Robert Orben | Cities and Travel Quotes
We're supposed to take our problems to a family adviser. Personally, I've never met a family adviser. They're all off somewhere listening to dirty stories.
- Robert Orben | Family Quotes
I don't want to say anything about my kids . . . but I go to PTA meetings under an assumed name!
- Robert Orben | Family Quotes
Have you noticed when you go on a diet, the first thing you lose is your temper.
- Robert Orben | Health Quotes
Cheap? If he was at the Last Supper, he would have asked for separate checks!
- Robert Orben | Insults Quotes
Planned obsolescence isn't a new idea - God always used it with people.
- Robert Orben | Life and Death Quotes
I had a terrible fight with my wife on New Year's Eve. She called me a procrastinator. So I finished addressing the Christmas cards and left.
- Robert Orben | Love and Marriage Quotes
Did you ever see that painting the Mona Lisa. It always reminds me of a reporter listening to a politician.
- Robert Orben | Politics Quotes
Every morning I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.
It's amazing how important your job is when you want the day off - and how unimportant it is when you want a raise.
What if the meek inherited the Earth and we had to defend ourselves from Martians?
- Robert Orben | Religion Quotes
I don't see why religion and science can't get along. What's wrong with counting our blessings with a computer?
- Robert Orben | Religion Quotes
My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she's as old as I am. Then she lies about my age.
- Robert Orben | Humorous Quotes
My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she's as old as I am. Then she lies about my age.
- Robert Orben | Humorous Quotes
My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she's as old as I am. Then she lies about my age.
- Robert Orben | Humorous Quotes
My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she's as old as I am. Then she lies about my age.
- Robert Orben | Humorous Quotes
My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she's as old as I am. Then she lies about my age.
- Robert Orben | Humorous Quotes
My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she's as old as I am. Then she lies about my age.
- Robert Orben | Humorous Quotes
My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she's as old as I am. Then she lies about my age.
- Robert Orben | Humorous Quotes
My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she's as old as I am. Then she lies about my age.
- Robert Orben | Humorous Quotes


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