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Jackie Mason Quotes and Quotations


You know how many stunning women told me they can't stand a good-looking man? ... Women feel secure with an ugly guy because a man in bad shape isn't gonna cheat.
- Jackie Mason | Other Side Quotes
Right now I have enough money to last me the rest of my life - unless I buy something.
- Jackie Mason | Money Quotes
Ladies and gentlemen, you can't please everyone. Take my girlfriend - I think she's the most remarkable woman in the world. . . . That's me . . . But to my wife . . .
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Home is the place, when you have to go there, they have to take you in.
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